“I turn on my computer. I wait patiently as it connects. I go online. My breath catches in my chest until I hear 3 little words, "You've got mail."

I keep on insisting in writing....in picturing with words all those things I think and feel and cannot say....at least say it to that couple of angels I cannot speak my mind to....directly...without being afraid or nervous...¿judged?...................I guess, this is gonna be a good exercise to train myself before getting into my master paper......................It's soft...invisible but harmful....it's me....and a couple of memories....some real....some made up...I have made up some memories these last days...and I like them....but I gotta face it....I'm trying to escape....to escape from poison of memories that are killing me today....I'm escaping from loneliness...but at the same time, I want to get a good friend....I don't want him to misunderstand....I just want his company and smile.....he's so kind....but time will tell..............I still wait for that phone call...that might never show up....but holds the silver thread of hope.....to convince myself that I didn't waste my time completely....that at least a little part of what I gave, grew up and has strong roots in the one I once loved so much.................

Today is a broken song

Well....it might sound a lil crazy, but I don't give a damn....Im just feeling......and I like it!!! Had a beautiful day...and above all, your beautiful image in my mind.....got a song....a piece of it and wanna give it to you......


"I was happy in my harbour When you cut me loose,,,,,,, Floating on an ocean And confused !!!!!!Winds are whipping waves up Like sky scrapers ::::::::::::::::::::And the harder they hit me The less I seem to bruise__________________ And when I Find the controls I'll go where I like I'll know where I want to be But maybe for now I'll stay right here On a si...lent sea On a silent sea..........""""""

...........Wanna share my harbour with you...the one who has awaken me from pain and made me believe hat today is my reality...and the most beautiful day....Tx for making me feel I'm good without making a big fuss....Just love it and want it to last today...for the sake of today and just for today.......On my silent sea............

Mi cama y yo

Hoy se me despertó el bicho de escribir...es que en un día pasan muchas cosas...pero muchas son muchas....tants, que queda uno cansado y solo quiere irse a dormir.

Bueno...tengo los ojos cansados...y no es la primera vez que ocurre....pero es un cansancio especial...

Y ya no queda sino llorar...

Estos días no han sido del todo buenos.
He repartido una que otra lágrima a uno que otro recuerdo.
Supongo que no está mal. Supongo que es normal.
Es solo que tengo esa sensación de vacio. De estar y no estar...de ser y no ser...de tener no respuestas a muchas preguntas.
Quisiera saber que todo esto ha sido un mal chiste...que su sonrisa, sus caricias y sus ojos grandes van a regresar...Pero no....la realidad compartida grita por todas partes el secreto del que nunca quise enterarme...y lloro....a veces rio...pero lloro más...
Ay....tú...
con esos ojos claros...grandes y risa loca...con tu dulce estupidez....esa falta de cordura que a veces fue tan dulce....esa misma que hoy me mata. ...me mata a pocos.......
Y bueno...qué se puede esperar de un payaso de pueblo???
de este pueblo llamado tierra....tan grande y a la vez tan chico....pueblo pequeño: infierno grande.....
.....y tus miedos...
tu miedo al sí y al no...
al hombre y a la mujer....
a saber quien eres....quien fuiste....
quien seras....
ese miedo a descubrir que tienes el cerebro lleno de mierda y aire...
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡AFORTUNADO QUE TIENES MIERDA!!!!
...porque tu corazón....ahhh....ese sí que está lleno de aire................................................lleno de nada..................................................................................de ese miedo de mierda que HUELE A MUERTO y solo hace daño...
Quién te crees???
Un niño jugando a ser grande???
..... Déjame decirte.....
..............................y para este momento suena música de fondo..............una gran fanfarria que anuncia la verdad que tanto ansías....
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡SE ENCIENDEN LAS LUCES!!!!!!!!!!!!
......................salen las modelos con tetas GRANDES que tanto te gustan, anunciando al presentador de programa de televisión barato ....sí....ese que tanto criticas....ese mismo...recita con su boca desagradable y soez que eres un don nadie.....un pobre pendejo jugando a SER alguien...

Don't know what's going on.....

Im not very keen on writing, but I'm gonna do my best to give it a try.
Im a person who believes in impossible things...but these days have been a little hard...the one I've loved the most just forsook me and trashed me as a piece of shit.....Well....shit happens they say...and it hurts....it hurts when you love...but....every morning has a new sunshine....I don't know if I love him anymore....he's so selfish... and shields himself in fear and lack of experience....Loving is a difficult task...but not impossible.....I know God has beautiful treasures for me....I first gotta find my way ...and then He will send me that angel who will support me, walk along with me and be strong enough to love me and accept the love I have to give :)